*smiles*

well thigs sure do change fast. this week has really been what i needed. it has changed me so much. i have come to realize things that i didn't know before. things that i never quite understood about myself and parts of me that almost felt empty. i hate to admit thsi bt since i have moved my relationship with god has been slipping. and i know it is my fault, but this week i have come to realize a lot.

i can't make it on my own. i can try as hard as i want but that doesn't mean it is going to happen. so i have come to realize i need god in my life. i need him to help me make my decicions not make them alone. i need him to help me choose what is right and what isn't and hopefully if i just keep praying and reading my bible and staying as close to the lord as i can, i might just make it through high school. but right now i am just so happy.

this week has been so changing for me. i realized dating a mormon was a bad idea and that i had to get out of that. so guess what...i did. well lets see megan was here this week. and that was okay. i mean it was nice to see her, but i don't know so much has changed since we were last together. but this week was fun. it was the first time in awhile that i could just relax and not have to worry about every little thing going on. like on sunday after church we stayed for the anual meeting and i just got to hang out with ty and bri mainly. it was a lot of fun because we were so crazy.

then on monday brianna called and asked if she could come over and of course i said yes and then megan was talking to david and the next thing i knew david was coming over and then by the time it was dinner tyler was there too. but once bri had left and david had it was 9:30 and we needed to get tyler home. well then something strage happened, tyler held my hand. it kind of shocked me because of past events. i was like so happy yet so scared of what could happen again. but i wasn't going to get all worked up about till i figured out more.

then on tuesday night brianna stayed the night with me a megan and we tried to pull an all nighter and failed. then on wednesday morning we went and saw she's the man and got tyler and chelsea so come. and tyler held my hand again. it totally freaked me out. yet i was so stinking happy. lol. i mean why shouldn't i be. so then wednsday night we had soccer at youth group and after that ty, evan, bri, chels, megan, and I just sat and talked for awhile waiting for are rides to get going. it was fun. then yesterday nothing too exciting happened other then i went and saw 8 below with bri and megan at the pix. it was a good moviebut after that megan and i tried to pull an all nighter but i crashed about 5:30ish. Then I was up at 8 so since thursday at 9 am i have gotten 2 and a half hours of sleep. lets just say im tired. lol.

today ty, bri, evan, terrell, and megan were all here. and we hung out and tried to watch a movie, played LOTR trivial pursuit, took random pics, and went out on the gator. it was an awesome day. well it might also help that a certain someone that i was crushing on asked me out.....*smiles*. but i haven't really stopped smiling but then again it was so funny to see everyone else reactions. it made me laugh. chelsea freaked and brianna was all happy and evan was just so proud of himself because he had a small part in it. good thing i love my friends. but tonight i went and saw ice age 2 with bri, chels, and evan and ty didn't come because he is stupid. and i don't know when i will see him next so i am sad about that. but i was cracking up because after the movie we ran into some of the people chels and bri eat lunch with and they introdused them to me and evan and then bri was all can i tell them and i said sure and she was all monica and tyler are going out and then showed them pics and it was funny because tyler is going to get so much crap on monday. lol. thats what he gets for not coming.

but for now i think i am going to go. this is starting to get really random and i need to go to sleep. i am sleep deprived and the rest of the stories are for another time. i love you all. and thanks for all the support. it is so nice to know that people care. well im gonna go. night!!

mo